Seriously, thank you so very much for the love tonight. I could feel it. And all that advice came in very handy when I was feeling overwhelmed and over emotional.
I won’t bother you with all the drama but I can tell you I feel lighter and happier than I have in a long time. My mom talked about her fears and why she’s stayed so still for so long. But also that she’s tired of living in “punishment” mode. She told him she was ready to move on – hoping, of course, he’ll change his mind and move along with her. I won’t give up on that hope but she told us not to count on it anymore. My brother admitted he has misplaced anger toward my new family – knowing it doesn’t make sense but just feeling like it’s an easy place set blame for a while.
It was good to hear what they’re feeling. It was good to just spend time face to face with them. It was good to tell my mom how much I missed going home – just really miss spending time in her house. Since she told my dad, I haven’t been welcome there. If I go to drop off Glory of pick her up, he goes to his bedroom. I have to call before I arrive or, worse, honk. I still can’t believe how bad it is.
But I feel like we’re headed to a better place. We agreed to check in more often – just to talk about where we are. And in the meantime, get together like we used to. We still can’t meet at my mom’s but hopefully that will change.
Again, thank you. Fingers crossed for positive movement.